"Then the man said, 'Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome.'"
Genesis 32:28
Have you ever felt like you were in a full-on wrestling match with God?
It happens to all of us. Struggling with God is a normal part of being human. We fight because we don't understand what is happening, or because we are angry, ashamed, or afraid. I don't think God minds when we wrestle with Him. He knows that sometimes the only way we can work through something is to fight through it.
Jacob went through this one night out in the desert alone (Genesis 32:24). He wrestled with God all night until the sun started to rise. He held on with so much persistence that God finally touched his hip socket to get him to stop (Genesis 32:25).
God didn't wrench Jacob's hip because He was afraid of losing. That would be like a toddler wrestling his dad. There is zero chance the toddler wins. I picture it more like a father letting his kid burn off energy. God knows we need to work through our emotions, so He lets us fight. We push with everything we have to prove our point, and He patiently lets us process it.
Any kind of fight is exhausting. The longer we fight against God, the more worn out we get. Eventually we realize that whatever we were digging our heels in over isn't worth the battle, and we just collapse.
The comfort in this story is what happens next. God doesn't let us hit the ground when we surrender. He catches us and holds us up.
And He doesn't just catch us. He blesses us. Jacob didn't walk away from that night the same man. He left with a limp, a new name, and a blessing. God met him right in the middle of the fight and marked him as changed. Israel, the one who wrestled with God and came through it.
That is the part I hold onto. When we finally stop fighting and let God catch us, He doesn't just set us back on our feet and send us on our way. He blesses us. And it is that blessing, being met and held and claimed by God, that gives us rest.
Jesus said, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). When you have fought until you have nothing left, remember that the rest waiting for you isn't only the end of the fight. It is the blessing on the other side of it.